every day for the last few weeks i have been able to choose selflessness in so many circumstances and it has been easy and rewarding and worth it.
only recently has it stung, a little. but i still think its worth it.
my needs can be met even if they arent met the way i would hope them to be, and as long as i can love someone else, or comfort someone else, or support someone else
it will always be okay.

my beautiful Chicago babies @torizilch @hrlee3 (at Chicago Place)

☔ chicago rain

everything is numb
and shaking
and beating faster than my breath can keep up with

and you’re completely worth it

#tbt my kidties @lindsayjoy222 @mikeblaszyk :*

sleep has now become sacred #welcometodaycamps

i just have to let it all go
every burning ash
dreams that lit like fire

what happens when you dont know how
or when you have no other way to give up
or you run out of words about surrender

and you go on
waiting to let go
of all the things you arent holding onto

maybe i havent really let go

i swear on all my bones that

you

are stained glass
and we are proof
sitting here separate

whoever thought up miles
distance
and time
must have been in love

i dont even love you
but i know i could
because of the way i see your
tainted, see-through, sad and beautiful pieces
melted together by cast iron fire
and
unwanted pressure
from here

miles from you
silent
waiting for the moon
(you are my moon)
to light the glass

my
empty church is full of presence
but not of you

mark His name on the back of my hand
call me His
i am His
call me His

forget my name and call me Israel
chosen Love
like a prostitute
but He still shows His love

Hosea, Hosea
tell me
tell me i am marked
His name on my lips
my hands
my tongue
like a prostitue
but my love is His

my God
is a devouring fire

swallowing me piece by piece
burn me all down to the ground
i said
but in perfection He
waits
change of body mind
heart and soul
is much more abrassive when it takes
so. much. time.

i have blood as comfort
blood as protection
and blood as a promise

i am set free
with every new chain i pick up and shake on
in attempt to shake off
my Valley of Trouble

“@nattt_nyland: I will return her vineyards to her & transform the Valley of Trouble into a gateway of hope. / Hosea 2.15 The Lords Love for Unfaithful Israel”

i could start now

with all my favorites
the angles
the laugh
the supporting hand behind your head and closed eyes

but i cant
they keep saying hours
but i want your minutes
and this is like a hot room

babe thing 💛 @teresej24 my bff #daycamps

babe thing @teresej24 #daycamps (at Liberty Bible Church)

#welcometodaycamps ;) @danaemd (at Liberty Bible Church)

happy birthday jessica!! 👭👭👑💜 @jrobsosilly @torizilch @chynadolly